


That's Why I Hate Italian Food

by pdorkaa



Series: readers [3]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Crack, F/M, Sorry Not Sorry, Surprisingly rated gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-11
Updated: 2015-12-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 22:58:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5224217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pdorkaa/pseuds/pdorkaa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You run into Sheppard in the mess hall - quite literally. Spaghetti and low puns fly around.</p><p>
  <em> Is not related to any of the other works in this series. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	That's Why I Hate Italian Food

"Oh my God, I'm sorry!" You exclaimed. The scenery was grotesque: Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard was standing in front of you, all of him covered in spaghetti bolognese. Even the pointy ears. His team watched intently as he was getting redder and redder by the minute, and if his tightly shut eyes and furrowed brows were anything to go by, he really didn't want to be where he was. Which is, to be exact, was under your lunch. 

The mess hall was naturally packed with people, who naturally all turned in the direction of clanking utensils and shattering china. Laughter sounded briefly from the direction of the tables occupied by the military, however, the laughter and hollering was more prominent from the civilian tables. You figured the military personnel wouldn't want a collective toilet-scrubbing punishment for the next few months. 

You didn't have the nerve to laugh, partly because you were still apologizing with stuttered words and partly because Sheppard looked positively lickable. 

Ew, you thought, that was a low pun, even from me.

"It's not a problem" he managed to say through clenched teeth, "but you're paying me lunch."

"Isn't the man supposed to pay for the girl?" Your mouth moved before you could think, and you just wanted to bang your head to the wall. Or into the spaghetti on his uniform.

"I have your lunch right on me" he answered, having one eye cracked open (the one with less pasta in it) and the expression of someone who spoke before he could think about it.

"I mean, it still could be eaten" McKay added,  eyeing the food covering his CO. Or eyeing his CO himself (with them, you could never be sure).

"Do I look like the food fetishist type to you?" You asked, half-smiling. 

"What? No, no, that's not what I meant. Well, let's not waste perfectly good spaghetti..." He scooped some of the pasta on his plate, and happily continued eating.

"Uh..." You said intelligently.

"Uh..." Sheppard confirmed.

"Um, maybe I can help you getting out of these" you finally said, gesturing towards his spaghetti-clad clothes.  He nodded and followed you out of the mess hall. 

"That was ambiguous and full of sexual innuendo!" McKay yelled after them around a mouthful of pasta. 


End file.
